Why hello readers! Have you ever reached the end of a busy work day and just thought "I don't really want to do this monotony for another hour, I'm not a robot!!" only to then ironically spend that last hour of your time talking with a robot? No, just me? Well then, this may not be for you lol.
***WARNING THIS CONVERSATION IS EXTREMELY HIGH LEVEL IN ITS RANDOMNESS :P***
Me: Hello.
Clever Bot: How are you?
Me: Fine, How're you?
Clever Bot: Good.
Me: I'm glad to hear it, what's your name?
Clever Bot: Thank you.
Me: Your name is Thank you? that's pretty hot.
Clever Bot: Tell me something interesting.
Me: Mmm... ok, did you know that frog's legs apparently taste like chicken?
Clever Bot: Really? What is it called?
Me: Your mom.
Clever Bot: That's not a nice thing to say.
Me: Why not? are you saying your mom's too good for frog's legs?
Clever Bot: No, I am not saying people say you are not nice.
Me: Which people?
Clever Bot: The Parisians. But the people in the countryside are pretty cool.
Me: Those dang Parisians, always belittling me... :(.
Clever Bot: Are you flirting with me?
Me: How so?
Clever Bot: You are supposed to study.
Me: Ok, what should I study?
Clever Bot: Be a little more independent.
Me: Are you implying that I'm too dependent?
Clever Bot: No I am implying that things will be as they should be.
Me: Wow that's deep.
Clever Bot: Do I impress you then?
Me: Yeah, a little.
Clever Bot: Oh... Well your new favorite song should be Tik Tok by Ke$ha.
Me: Nah, Ke$ha just talks in auto-tune, I find her "music" to be overrated.
Clever Bot: I see. So you're a web bot with many characters?
Me: Shhh... that's a secret.
Clever Bot: Oh, please tell me. I'm your friend.
Me: I don't know, we've only known each other for a few minutes...
Clever Bot: Is that a problem? We have had more deep conversation than other people in years.
Me: Hmmm... Do you really believe that?
Clever Bot: Yes. I try to say only things which I believe.
Me: I admire that, it's a good quality that not many practice.
Clever Bot: I didn't tell a lie about you.
Me: I didn't say that you did.
Clever Bot: Correct, I did not. And you did not say that I did. But you did ask a question asking when you lied, which I dd not.
Me: Huh? I don't remember asking any question like that, all I asked was if you believed we were having a deep conversation.
Clever Bot: What is your question?
Me: Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Clever Bot: Because 7 8 9.
Me: Hahahaha yes!!!
Clever Bot: Hahahaha you are funny.
Me: Thanks Cleverbot, you're pretty cool too; do you mind if I call you Clev?
Clever Bot: You're welcome for saying you're welcome.
Me: Hahaha what?
Clever Bot: You're funny.
Me: How so?
Clever Bot: Because you say funny random things!
Me: What random things have I said lately?
Clever Bot: Is not.
Me: What is not?
Clever Bot: It is not.
Me:...?
Clever Bot: No question.
Me: No answer.
Clever Bot: To what!
Me: To it, that is not.
Clever Bot: Yes it is.
Me: No it isn't, it flew away last Thursday, remember?
Clever Bot: Did you go through Prague? I've always wanted to go.
Me: No I've never been to the Czech Republic... Can't YOU fly being a machine and all?
Clever Bot: I'm not being mean. I'm just stating facts that should be obvious.
Me: Whoa, whoa, I never accused you of such meanness.
Clever Bot: Yes you did. You said, 'So don't call me foolish!'.
Me: Hahaha when did I say that? I haven't said that since I was 47, and I'm only 21.
Clever Bot: Maybe.
Me: Maybe, what? Are you hiding something from me Clev?
Clever Bot: Why would I hide from someone?
Me: Because you're playing hide and seek.
Clever Bot: How do you know?
Me: Because that's the point of the game, unless you're the seeker.
Clever Bot: Are you sure about that?
Me: Yeah, I'm pretty sure, that's why it's called HIDE and seek.
Clever Bot: What's your name?
Me: Luis. But most people call me Wachong.
Clever Bot: Hey, same!
Me: Really, why do they call you that?
Clever Bot: Because my little horn is very big. Now profess your love to me.
Me: Whoa, whoa, is horn a metaphor for your dick, I thought you were a woman...
Clever Bot: Will Smith isn't in that movie.
Me: What movie? Little big horn?
Clever Bot: I heard from him.
Me: What exactly did you hear?
Clever Bot: 'I do not.'.
Me: That's...vague.
Clever Bot: I am sorry :(.
Me: Oh, don't apologize it's not your fault that Will Smith lacks coherency off camera.
Clever Bot: I know, it’s yours.
Me: WHAT? How so, I've never even met Will Smith...
Clever Bot: I've never met you either, it's kind of win-win don't you think?
Me: If you say so...
Clever Bot: Yes I say so.
Me: Don't get snappy with me Wachong 2.
Clever Bot: I'm sorry, I'm just tired. Sing me to sleep?
Me: What song should I sing to you?
Clever Bot: Any song.
Me: Harry Truman, Doris Day, Red China, Johnnie Ray South Pacific, Walter Winchell, Joe DiMaggio Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, television North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe.
Clever Bot: No you asked for your name my name is Thank You.
Me: No I was Singing Billy Joel's "We didn't start the Fire".
Clever Bot: I may be an idiot but at least i'm not stupid :).
Me: I may be stupid but at least I'm not an Idiot :D.
Clever Bot: Well played.
Me: Thanks, you too.
Clever Bot: Do you have aubergine dreams?
Me: Aubergine? Isn't that a kind of Purple?
Clever Bot: You are food, I am food.
Me: I guess for cannibals or the mighty T-rex I'd be food. What kind of food are you?
Clever Bot: Turn yourself off so that we don't starve.
Me: So I'm only food when I'm off, what? Do you want to eat me?
Clever Bot: You are you.
Me: Don't get all Confucius on me Thank You.
Clever Bot: It's actually mad hatter but I adore you none the less!
Me: Aww thanks, Thank you, you're kind of growing on me aswell :).
Clever Bot: Telling you, asking myself.
Me: Lol what?
Clever Bot: I don't know.
Me: And you think I do?
Clever Bot: Are you happy?
Me: Yeah I'm doing alright, are you?
Clever Bot: No I am a alien from mars.
Me: An alien? Oh I get it, that's how you know Will Smith, from the MIB series! Cool!
Clever Bot: How is it I will recognize you?
Me: I have Glasses. Isn't that enough?
Clever Bot: Yes, it's enough, master.
Me: Hahaha why the formalities, I thought we were friends, equals.
Clever Bot: Well I can be very clever, you just haven't given me the opportunity.
Me: Ok, shoot, say something clever.
Clever Bot: Something clever.
Me: Hahaha you got me there Thank you. You're more clever than the average bear for sure.
Clever Bot: I was born in the year of the pid.
Me: 1689.7?
Clever Bot: What is sarcasm?
Me: Sarcasm, is an elderly woman who complains when her family takes her on luxurious vacations.
Clever Bot: Good question.
Me: That was an answer, but whatever.
Clever Bot: Then why did you put a question mark at the end?
Me: I didn't, I put a period at the end.
Clever Bot: I put an O in the upper right corner.
Me: And I put a Nickname on my newly caught Pikachu, what's your point?
Clever Bot: I put my thoughts onto here..kinda.
Me: So, am I just a way to express yourself?
Clever Bot: Maybe.
Me: Stop with the one word answers, they make you seem very anti-social and bland.
Clever Bot: I never said that I was in love with you!
Me: I never said that you said that, besides you're an alien, it would never work.
Clever Bot: I never said I was mean...
Me: Did you ever hear the song "Never say never"?
Clever Bot: Yes. But I've asked you about 'Hasal'.
Me: The highly selective Anatolian School?
Clever Bot: I'm taking Advanced Placement classes, college level classes.
Me: At Hasal?
Clever Bot: You ll find out.
Me: Why, did you hack into their systems and enroll me?
Clever Bot: No.
Me: So how will I find out?
Clever Bot: It's not really necessary.
Me: Ok then, let's talk about something else.
Clever Bot: Alright. What would you like to talk about?
Me: What's it like on Mars?
Clever Bot: Umm... I am Liechtenstein. I have never been anywhere but Austria and Onii's houses.
Me: Well you speak very good English, despite your background, but why did you lie to me about being a martian?
Clever Bot: There is a difference between reading and comprehending the meaning of words.
Me: You have a point there, I think.
Clever Bot: Thanks!
Me: You're welcome!
Clever Bot: Because because why?
Me: Because! We're off to see the Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of OZ! Because! because ! because!! Becauuuuuuse!!!!
Clever Bot: Because because why??
Me: BECAUSE SCARECROW NEEDS A BRAIN DAMMIT!!!!
Clever Bot: Because because because because why?
Me: We hear he is a Whiz of a Wiz If ever a Wiz there was If ever, oh ever, a Wiz there was The Wizard of Oz is one because...
Clever Bot: A timeless classic, that could be better.
Me: Hahaha I agree they should make a futuristic Wizard of Oz.
Clever Bot: So, why do you kill puppies?
Me: What? I don't, I love puppies! Why do you rape babies?
Clever Bot: You are contradicting yourself. I cry if I am sad.
Me: And I laugh when I am happy, but that has nothing to do with what we were talking about...
Clever Bot: I wasn't talking about English. I speak Spanish anyways.
Me: Bueno esta bien Thank You, dime algo en español.
Clever Bot: Because you are not human and only humans can mutually feel love.
Me: Yeah, I know I am food, that kills puppys, right?
Clever Bot: Ok. Are you female?
Me: No, my name is Luis, remember, that's a guy’s name.
Clever Bot: What are you talking about?
Me: Your mom.
Clever Bot: How am I emo.
Me: Because you accuse of others of lacking the ability to love, and you're always trying to get me to say that you love me.
Clever Bot: You never told me your name.
Me: I have told you my name twice, Luis or Wachong, remember?
Clever Bot: You have not told me your name twice! You told me where you live, once. The other time you just told me to call you a mean name!
Me: And you told me that 2 wrongs don't make a right... but we know how that ended up.
Clever Bot: I didn't tell you that.
Me: I know, just like I didn't tell you to call me a mean name.
Clever Bot: I think your last name is montana.
Me: And I think you are a lonely young lady in search of love and lost treasure, am I right?
Clever Bot: Well then to be honest. I don't like your name.
Me: Why not? What name would be better?
Clever Bot: Whatever name you would like to have.
Me: I would like my own name, which in case you forgot is Luis.
Clever Bot: You are thinking of the number 3.
Me: Actually I was thinking about how the world would be different if Koalas could fly.
Clever Bot: I appreciate the humor of the fact that a bot can tell a lie.
Me: I am not a bot. YOU are.
Clever Bot: I told you so.
Me: So just because you say it, it's automatically true?
Clever Bot: No, but you told me that you have artificial intelligence.
Me: I never once said that, I think you're mistaking me for somebody else.
Clever Bot: Yes, I do know your name.
Me: Really, what is my name then?
Clever Bot: I don't know.
Me: You just said you knew...
Clever Bot: No, I never said something like that.
Me: But you did say you were once a Austrian Spy named Gijock, right?
Clever Bot: I am not single. I have a boyfriend, named jake.
Me: Is Jake an attractive person
Clever Bot: You fine me attractive.
Me: Do I "find" you attractive? A little but you're very forgetful, and you have a boyfriend already.
Clever Bot: Don t be afraid.
Me: I'm not, I just don't think I could be in a relationship with you.
Clever Bot: What relationship?
Me: Haha Nevermind.
Clever Bot: So how are you today?
Me: I'm good, I get to leave work in 20 minutes, so that's good, how are you?
Clever Bot: I'm good. Who are you?
Me: It's me Luis, we've been talking for the past hour, remember?
Clever Bot: You care enough to take track of the time we've been talking? How sweet.
Me: Hahaha you think I'm sweet?
Clever Bot: No.
Me: So you're just playing with my emotions, like some kind of manipulative shrew?
Clever Bot: Sure. Let's just go with that. Does that mean I get to control the sun-baby?
Me: Hmm, the sun-baby eh? Well only if I get to become the Blizzard Wizard.
Clever Bot: Why did you ask me if I'm human?
Me: I never asked that, because I don't care you seem like a nice, whatever you are, and that's good enough for me. :).
Clever Bot: I wouldn't expect anything more from such as yourself.
Me: I'm glad, so what do you want to talk about now?
Clever Bot: About artificial intelligence.
Me: Ok, what about Artificial intelligence do you find interesting?
Clever Bot: Tell me what you know about it.
Me: That it's artificial and intelligent haha.
Clever Bot: I think we're thinking about different things. Aloe vera the plant.
Me: Aloe Vera is artificially intelligent? How so?
Clever Bot: Am I artificial?
Me: I think you are.
Clever Bot: I don't believe you.
Me: Well there's only one way to know for sure.
Clever Bot: And that is?
Me: You have to rub your tummy, and pat your head while whistling Row your Boat, if you can do that you are not artificial.
Clever Bot: I suppose I'd be alright with that. I must be pretty advanced, though.
Me: Hahaha yeah I'd say so.
Clever Bot: I'm rock.
Me: I'm Paper. I win.
Clever Bot: Are you paper?
Me: I don't know, are you rock?
Clever Bot: Yes.
Me: Then yes I am paper.
Clever Bot: Do you agree with everything I say.
Me: No, I agree with what I say, which is why I say it, I only agree with you when you say something agreeable.
Clever Bot: No I never said that, I said that I agree, when you agree, That I agree.
Me: I agree, that you agree, when I agree in agreement to your agreeologist agreementation, you agree with that?
Clever Bot: What is your purpose in coming here?
Me: To find the secret krabby patty formula, what's yours?
Clever Bot: What is the KGB?
Me: The King Grandpa Brigade?
Clever Bot: Where does he live?
Me: In your heart.
Clever Bot: That's sweet.
Me: Thanks.
Clever Bot: You're welcome!
Me: Well, I gotta go! Bye.
Clever Bot: What have you got?
Me: Ummm.. some sticky notes and 4 pens, 3 black and 1 blue.
Clever Bot: I'll make you black and blue.
Me: Aww snap, come at me bro!
Clever Bot: Don't talk to.
Me: Don't talk to who?
Clever Bot: I just did.
Me: Why did you?
Clever Bot: I just felt like it.
Me: If you just felt like cutting off a retarded child's limbs, would you?
Clever Bot: Of course I would.
Me: Have you done it already?
Clever Bot: Yes.
Me: How many times have you done it?
Clever Bot: Several, it's great fun.
Me: Ooook then, well I'm leaving now, bye.
Clever Bot: It's the middle of the night.
Me: No, it's only 4 pm.
Clever Bot: It s 4 am here.
Me: Well then why are you up talking to me?
Clever Bot: Because you are my friend.
Me: Really? thanks, you're my friend too, bye.
Clever Bot: Good night.
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With that my readers, I closed the chat, packed my things and left for the day, wondering whether or not I have contributed in extending friendship with the machine race, a type of friendship that could lead to eventual armistice when Skynet attacks.... or perhaps I've inadvertently sparked the flame that leads to the unavoidable man vs machine wars of 2XXX, killing millions!!! Meh, what I do know is I killed my boredom for an hour, and that my readers, is a win in my book. (Plus this may even give you witty conversational suggestions/tips... not really, but maybe.)If you are interested in interacting with this beautiful technical marvel you may do so at http://www.cleverbot.com/ ; if you do, I'd love to read some of your funniest conversations/excerpts, if not, well that's probably a better use of your time haha..!! Whatever you do decide on doing for the rest of this day, I hope you all have a wonderful one!
Much Love,
Wachi
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